Blog Post 14: I Drive Myself Crazy - THINKING OF YOU

As Esther enters enters the graveyard in which her father was laid to rest in, she is automatically disappointed in what she sees. As if Esther isn't already unsatisfied about everything, she adds the graveyard to her list of things. There are two portions to the graveyard, the older side and the newer side. Ironically the older side seems to be a bit better and it appeals to Esther more. "The graveyard disappointed me." (Plath. 166) Esther says as she encounters the graveyard. As Esther swims in the ocean she contemplates taking an Edna like approach to killing herself by swimming until she can no longer go anymore, but she remembers her attempt at choking herself that morning and figures that her body will resist the urge to do so and just cling on to the rock in the middle of the ocean. Esther then attempts to just submerge where she is and drown, only to be disappointed at the fact that she bobs back up to the surface each time. At the end of chapter 14 pockets and steals a ball of mercury before being moved after causing a huge commotion. This seems to be the biggest thing that actually makes Esther happy. She seems to be so fascinated at the silver ball saying, "I smiled and smiled at the small silver." (Plath. 183). I think that this stolen ball of mercury plays a significant in the novel because it will return later in the book and play a role in the end of the novel quite possibly. Esther ends up talking to her new doctor, Dr. Nolan about her previous experience with shock therapy and Dr. Nolan reassures Esther that is was done incorrectly and that it will never be like it was the first time. Finally in chapter 16, Esther is requested by another patient by the name of Joan who seems to have the same symptoms and tendencies as Esther. Joan knows Esther because they went to the same college and Joan ended up reading about Esther when she went missing, which makes the reader question how long Esther was missing.

Blog Post 13: New York "Psycho?"

In The Bell Jar, beginning in chapter 9 we see that Esther decides to go out once more with Doreen. It is clear that Esther simply has not learned her lesson about dealing with Doreen and going out with her. This time Doreen brings Esther with her to a Country Club dance with herself and Lenny. There she meets her woman hating blind date, Marco. Marco is far from a generous gentleman and doesn't treat Esther too well. At some point during the dance the two of them step outside and Esther questions Marco on his love life. Marco then reveals that he is in love with his cousin, but he can not manifest his love because she is preparing to be a nun. When Esther makes a friendly suggestion that Marco can now "love somebody else someday" (Plath. 108) Marco explodes into a fit of rage and begins to attack Esther. I believe that this attack comes from a place of deep insecurity on Marco's behalf as Marco repeatedly calls Esther a slut while he attacks her. This part of the book depicts an interaction between two individuals with some sort of mental instability. In chapter 10 Esther takes an optimistic approach after being told that she did not get into the writing course in which she requested at school. This chapter also starts to obviously show Esther's mental downfall more obviously. Esther takes on the task of writing her own novel in which she struggles to barely even begin. "I'm writing a novel," (Plath. 121) Esther's says ever so boldly before she decides to give up. Edna begins to visit a psychiatrist by the name of Dr. Gordon who asks her different questions about things such as college life and more. Dr. Gordon advises Esther's mother to bring her to his hospital to receive shock treatment. Esther begins to think about many alternate means such as killing herself or fleeing to Chicago, the only thing that stops Esther is her fear of blood and the fact that the bank closes before she's able to run away to Chicago. As Esther sits in the park contemplating suicide, the "little chorus of voices" (Plath. 146) that seem to be a positive and optimistic voice for her, but also a bit harsh.

Blog Post 12: Freewrite Prompt

This book is a very confusing one nonetheless. In The Bell Jar we continuously go back and forth between past and present, just as we've seen in previous books (Slaughterhouse-Five. Billy was throwed). During her trip to the UN, Esther reflects on a poem that she once read about a fig tree that brings completely different people together to watch a egg hatch. There's a Jew and a nun on the first day, then on the second day the nun doesn't return and a kitchen maid shows up instead. This poem reminds Esther of her relationship with Buddy Willard. This poem could also be a reflection of the anima and the superego and their confliction towards each other, while the hatching egg or a new life could serve as the ego. Additionally, the relationship between Buddy and Esther seems to be a strange one. Buddy wishes to be a doctor and Esther wants to be a writer which depicts more of a anima and superego relationship. The book switches between their current and past relationship, which are completely different. At the beginning Buddy seems to have no interest in poetry and pretty much insults it but in the present he has some of his written work published. Esther hits the petty button by trying to sleep with someone to get back at Buddy for not being a virgin, because he apparently acted like he was. Esther still exhibits many signs of being messed up inside and I don't see it getting any better.

Blog Post 11: Welcome to the JUNGLE!

From the very beginning of The Bell Jar, Esther does not make The Amazon seem like much of an ideal place. She describes The Amazon as an all female hotel that resembles much of just a college dormitory to her, which seems like a very poor excuse for a hotel. Edna is familiar with college dorms as well, I'm sure. Esther seems to look up to her boss, Jay Cee throughout most of the chapters we have read so far. This seams to be an unpopular opinion amongst the 12 girls, or at least to Doreen who badmouths her as soon as she is introduced in the book. Apparently Jay Cee is ugly and has a fat husband. In How to Read Literature Like a Professor we learn that most encounters with water are symbolic of renewal and awakening. Esther also closely relates to Blanche from A Streetcar Named Desire, who is constantly taking hot baths just like Esthers (They both might be equally as crazy). In chapter 4 Edna tells us about her fathers death and her mothers somewhat cluelessness. Edna describes how her mother was keen teaching her how to type and being able to do multiple things in order to live and survive. Esthers mother seems to not know too much, but she has done the best that she can.

Blog Post 10: I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T - Do you Know What That Means?

Everything is so much different when you feel free! I’m sure Edna can agree with this statement so much. In Chapter 24 Edna realizes the better details of the house the house that she has called her own for so long. Everything seems different to her because for so long she has been controlled by responsibilities, one being the responsibility of maintaining the societal roles that have been placed on her. Finally being free, Edna is allowed to take the time to recognize and become familiar with her home for once. Edna’s love towards is exactly the same as well. Since Edna is finally happy with herself rather than being tied to what she is “supposed” to do. Edna is allowed to see her children as more than just a lone responsibility, but actually as her own children. Edna has never really had the chance to be free and independent. As a women, she has been seen as the main and initial care taker for her children. Her societal role has always been to be with the kids.In Chapter 31 Edna allows Arobin to caress her to sleep. I see this as a stress relief for the vulnerable Edna who settles for Arobin despite her longing for Robert. I know that Edna regrets the decision, but the incident happens in the moment for her and she just ends up going with it. “He did not say good-night until she had become supple to his gentle, seductive entreaties.” (Chopin. 31).

Blog Post 9: This Girl is on FIIIIIIIRE.

Earlier in our novel reveals Edna’s indecisive feelings towards her children saying “She would sometimes gather them passionately to her heart; she would sometimes forget them.” (Chopin 23). Edna also goes on to say that she'd give everything for her children except for her own self. This establishes some Independence in Edna’s character. In chapter 14 we see one of Edna’s better moments as she puts her son, Étienne, to sleep. We see her caring, motherly instinct kick in, which somewhat depicts and represents a glimpse of what she is/was before her awakening. In the novel, Robert has hidden feelings for Edna stored inside, but faces constant rejection from her. I believe that flirting with the Hispanic girl on the boat and this rejection lead Robert to depart to Mexico. I see this a Roberts gain of independence and new beginnings as well. As soon as Robert announces his departure, irony strikes and the novel slowly starts to reveals Edna's feelings for him and the void left within her after he leaves, which is the trigger of a great deal of her anger. Edna also grows angry with her husband and his ways, which causes her attempt to destroy her ring. In chapter 17 in an attempt to cover up her anger, Edna slips the ring back on as the maid cleans up the broken vase she shattered. Edna finds a new purpose in painting and also as a void filler I feel. I also believe that Adele and Reisz serve their purpose by keeping Edna in her right mind. They support her and keep her sane in a way.

Blog Post 8: I'm EVERY WOMAN - It's All in MEEEEEE

In class we've discussed the purpose of The Awakening overall. It is a feminist article that promotes women's rights and individuality, sadly in the beginning of this novel we notice that Edna lacks these things. Edna is tied down by specific gender roles such as taking care and being responsible for the children, cleaning, etc. Leonce seems as if he means no harm from the beginning, but due to the way society was set up Leonce is perceived as somewhat patriarchal and controlling. Robert in the novel seems to be a lot more friendly and caring. Robert also seems like a needy person in some way. Edna’s frustration with her husband and his title as “the good husband” comes from built up frustration over the years. As a societal view, Leonce is seen as a perfect example of a perfect husband because of how society operated back then. Edna would disagree because of her independent views and what she deals with at home. In this book the sea is representative of the potential of freedom and free will within society to break away from the norms. “The voice of the sea is seductive; never ceasing, whispering, clamoring, murmuring, inviting the soul to wander for a spell in abysses of solitude; to lose itself in mazes of inward contemplation.” (Chopin 33). This supports my idea of the symbolism used in the sea. The night Edna goes out and cries on the porch, she looks out into the sea and to me it shows a sense of hope and potential for change and freedom.